I had dinner tonight at the Cheesecake Factory. I sat at the bar ’cause it was so crowded and next to me sat a very lovely lady who was obviously in distress. We chatted. Her Project Manager had yelled at her so rudely (in her opinion) that she was seriously considering quitting a job she loved.She explained that she had been sent down from Sacramento to work on a project here in Milpitas because of her area of specialty. She was well respected in her home office, talented and loved the work she was doing.
She had been done here for several weeks on an emergency basis, leaving her family behind. She was tired, over-worked, and lonely. She’d been working days, evenings, and weekends to bring in the Milpitas project.
Unfortunately, she and several other people failed to procure something important to the project resulting in this Project Manager screaming at her. She was close to crying and very close to quitting.
She and I talked for a while and I sugested two things. 1: That she not take it personally, but realize that this was his personal style – not a very good one – one that might have worked on the High School football team, or in the army – but certainly not with adult professionals. 2: That tomorrow she sit down with him and suggest they both make a list of all the things that are necessary to complete the project.
After eating a gorgeous dessert she left feeling much better and with a strategy in place.
My advice: Don’t take managers’ moods personally. Listen carefully to the words, try to understand the real meaning and need – and be willing to admit that you too aren’t perfect. ArLyne